A dream I once had Part 1

There have been to occasions in my life where I have awoken from a dream with pause for thought that I can remember. The first of which was in about year 11. I was in a cabin sitting on a bunk bed and Dolly Parton was sitting singing me songs, one thing lead to another and well we slept together.
At the time I listened to Tool Aenema almost exclusively (occasionally listening to Primus and I think I was enjoying fear factoryat that point) in fact it was probably whilst I still had my fatalistic revelation that one day I was going to die and there were only so many times in my life I could listen to 'White Room' by cream before I died, a song that despite forcing myself to listen to every morning still gives me a sense of religious ecstasy apon listening to, I had absolutely no contact with Dolly Parton except glimpsing her in steel magnolias. I had no knowledge, I didn't even know any of her songs, what did it mean? why did I have carnel knowledge of her in my dreams? How did she seduce me? Was invading adolescent boys' dreams the next step of desperation after cosmetic surgey?
You know what, it didn't mean anything. But it gave me pause for thought because you know what? I loved it. It was great.
Since then alongside the guitar gods of 1969 britain, and the bay area virtuosos of 1996 california dolly parton resided as my bizzarre musical influence from somewhere else, somewhere different. I embraced this strange relationship I had with a distant star. I never recaptured the romance sure, or the passion I guess I'm not sure how romantic it was. I like to think the experience of experiencing such an experienced celebrity has helped make me a confident lover if not a very good one. It's given me that edge. I've never doubted myself, thanks Dolly. Furthermore it's influence can be felt in other areas. My general attitude was changed, I could draw out the positive from things outside my experience. I like Dolly Parton's music now, but the motive was getting to know a lover better. I never would have picked up the tacky rhinestone encrusted cd of my own accord. But I'll read about stuff now that equally I have never had any interest in. Pythagorus is a nut, he competed with Jesus to form his own religious community and we forget this amongst right angle triangles! I did just becuase I was trying to find something interesting about maths in year 12 hoping to make studying easier. It broadened me my magical night with DP. I listen to more genres than I would have. It allowed me to accept Audioslave appreciating Cornell's contribution in his more flexible vocal styling allowing a blues influence to creep into Morello's playing. It's also a great strategy for gift giving. Give people gifts you enjoy and find interesting. Sure you're loved one will be initially dissapointed but eventually they'll find time to read that book or play that banjo. And one day, one day in a job interview, these peculiar interests, these inconsistencies of character are going to give me the competitive edge.
Or get me ostracised from society in general.
Dolly Parton is hot.
P.S. It's really nerve wracking writing about this at work. You don't know what it's like thinking someone's going to read about your infatuation with dolly parton over your shoulder.