Buddhists vs Labradorians

So I'm so efficient now at work I could come in for an hour a day. Today I literally had a massive project dumped on my lap. I still couldn't panic. Infact I knew if I worked hard on it I'd have no reason to come into work next week.
I'm on top of things like a latino lover.
So some good things to break up my day where some of them emails that get sent around offices that aren't that funny or creative but highlight the mediocre existence that is office life by being more interesting than whatever the fuck it is you're paid to do.
One was ironically titled good karma and consisted of 'The Dalai Lama's message for 2006' it had all these tips like 'when arguing with someone you love don't bring up the past but focus on the present moment' stuff like that, yet this email still praid on peoples fundamental superstition with a -

If you send this to 0-4 people you will recieve a pleasant surprise
5-10 people two pleasent surprises
11-20 three pleasant surprises
96+ your life will improve dramatically and all your dreams will come true.

Now I could be happy to send this on to my superstitious friends which puts pressure on them to send it to yet more friends and given that it has been proven that everyone knows everyone via 6 degrees of seperation by that stage there's probably nobody with internet access left to send this message to and spread the good karma with superstitious paranoia driven greed bundled in.
I love shinto because it's a user pays religion, this 'karma' thing didn't tickle me too much. btw from selecting 0 from 0-4 I've had three pleasant surprises and not insignificant ones already today, possibly 4 infact today everything has gone my way.
The other stupid email I got today was from someone who knew I was a dog lover and possibly outlined the entire labradorian belief system. It truly is a dogs life. This one didn't come with any catches.
I remember my sis yo Madoka telling me off when I started speaking to her like she was my pochi pet but I can't think of a purer more loving relationship I ever had. Madoka use to shake her fists and stomp her feet I ticked her off so much. I miss my sis yo.
Anyway I was not obliged to send it on to anyone but I probably should instead I may just post it in it's completeness here:

GOOD ADVICE
If a dog was the teacher you would learn stuff like:
When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.
Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.
When it's in your best interest, practice obedience.
Let others know when they've invaded your territory.
Take naps.
Stretch before rising.
Run, romp, and play daily.
Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
On warm days, stop to lie on your back in the grass.
On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.
When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
No matter how often you're scolded, don't buy into the guilt thing and pout..! run right back and make friends.
Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
Eat with gusto and enthusiasm. Stop when you have had enough.
Be loyal. Never pretend to be something you're not.
If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them gently.
I AM THANKFUL FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME!
SEND THIS TO PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT. . I JUST DID

SO yeah it's probably overly effectionate but what the fuck just cause your father made you lick the area between his scrotum and his arsehole doesn't mean the rest of us can't be sentimental once in a while.