Papa

I was watching top gear today, and a random thing set off a random chain of thoughts in my head that I thought was worth writing about.
It was triggered by a dune buggy type vehicle the top gear guys were bashing around a paddock having great fun and the chasis bore a resemblance to a plane called the 'mad mouse' I saw at an airshow in ballarat when I was a kid. The plane was an ugly ungainly piece of shit but I remembered the name because it was distinctive. (an early lesson in marketing for those who choose brands that don't mean anything like f14) I remember that because my Nana asked me what planes I saw at the show and what Papa's favorite was and I said it was the 'mad mouse' even though I'm pretty sure he hated that one I just couldn't remember any of the other planes.
Anyway that's what I thought about and when it comes to it. It's one of my only memories of Papa. My dad's father, he died when I was 8 and I didn't know at the time that he had been deaf all my life.
So my father's father drifted out of my life without me ever really knowing who he was. He was the first to go too. When you think about it, my dad's Y chromosome is has to be his and thus also has to be mine. He's literally half of me and I don't know a thing about him (apart from the fact that his name is norman) most of what I do know was read out in his Eulogy by my cousin Suzie.
I can't say I regret not getting to know him better because I was fucking 8 and he was the first person I knew to ever die. Before that I didn't realise anyone I knew ever would.