Dear Santa/Ode to a Beard

Ah, Baron Davis. Is there no finer beard than yours? Pay attention all, this beard I cannot even say what it brings to the table, how to describe its singular perfection. Its brashness and boldness, its fortitude, its sophistication. Maybe it can be defined more easily, like terrorism or unaustralianism by simply stating what it is not, and it is not the beard of a peadophile. No this is the beard of a man who struts around his house in some kind of satin robe, with a beautiful lady lying in wait for him, that whilst he is flossing his teeth, and inumerable ninja's start pouring off the rooftop silently, Baron Davis' beard is not afraid. That's the kind of beard it is, the beard wears the man not the other way round.
If men with beards have something to hide, then this beard hides all imperfection and human frailties, it is a beard I would love to have as the prime minister elect of Australia, a beard unafraid to tackle the big issues, global warming, globelisation and diminished interest in globe lighting.

Behold the beard.

On another note, santa, my mother asked me what I wanted for christmass. I said 'less'. I really don't need anything right now whilst travelling. And I can unwrap some kind of candybar on the day as my christmass treat, anyhoo point of the matter of the fact is though. Here is my wishist of material possessions currently between me and spiritual fulfillment.

1. A Pete Maravich Jersey, I would love a purple Utah one with the No 7 and "Pistol" instead of maravich printed on the back. But ebay doesn't seem to offer those.

2. A Kareem Abdul-Jabbar LA Lakers throwback jersey. One of those yellow mesh ones, Kareem is about the player I least resemble in both appearance and playing style, I would also settle for some of his old school white goggles.

3. A Charles Barkley 34 Pheonix Suns Jersey, what is it with me and purple, the purple one or the white one, so long as they have the sun blazng across the chest.

4. A Shawn Kemp 40 Seattle Sonics Jersey, one with green backing and Sonics written on the white strip, none of the others are cool.

5. A pinstripe Dennis Rodman 91 bulls jersey.

6. A 23 Chicago Jordan Jersey, for special occassions, like asking for a home loan or getting married, to let them know I mean business.

7. A Latrell Sprewell jersey, the most hilarious guy ever to play. Knicks, Timberwolves, Golden State their all good for the American Dream.

8. A Detroit Pistons 3 Ben Wallace 2005-6 Jersey, white. These look nice.

9. A Vince Carter Toronto Raptors 15 jersey. For when he was jumping out of the gym.