tohm's Fashion Week (Or 5 things I don't like about fashion): 3

[Ed: I added a conclusion to yesterdays post which really got away from me structure wise, though if you found it had interesting tidbits scattered without, you may want to go back and read the last twoish paragraphs.]

They say imitation is the highest form of flattery, but Identity theft is a crime. Purchasable lifestyles is the topic of today.

Let's make it personal - there are certain traits that people see in anyone, and with it comes the burden of recommendations based on that trait originating from people who don't possess it themselves. Say you are a literary critique, sooner or later somebody will recommend the most 'brilliant' book they've ever read 'The Da Vinci Code' and then want a long and painful conversation about how clever Dan Brown must be. Or say you are a comedian, at some point somebody is going to tell you 'Major Payne' is a laugh riot.

Now imagine people think you are a 'bit of a character' a bit 'out there' or that you 'like alternative stuff'. The tragedy of my life is that people think I find somebody who looks like this:
image sourced from SWPL #121

More interesting than somebody who looks like this:


But think about it - What Don't you know about the girl in the first picture? vs. the girl in the second picture?

Clothing is a communication, just like packaging is for a product. Clothing can communicate about our identities and values. But the message can also become disingenous, conflicted or hypocritical.

It is the sad truth, that some of the most toxically boring people I've ever met have been bedecked out like a cast member of ABC's hit TV series 'Heart Break High'.

Perhaps think of it this way - if you were to go to a job interview and quietly and calmy announce 'I'm interesting' you might have a chance of being believed. If you were to walk into the interview and yell 'I'M INTERESTING PAY ATTENTION TO ME PLEASE!' People would perhaps be more inclined to think you weren't.

Now... Have you noticed how everyone's a designer now? Thanks to stores like T-Bar, the online Threadless and Typetext and so fourth, and the things I talked about in my first post - namely the high fidelity and speed with which fashon can spread now a walk around the CBD is the clothing equivalent of a drive through a traffic jam. so many people are 'honking' their clothing horns that there's no point paying attention to anybody.

Perhaps in no other time was it harder to be unfashionable than now, it takes far more effort to go out and buy some clothing that is out of style than it does to keep up with the trends. There are far fewer places to buy a plain white t-shirt than a colurful print t-shirt by some freelance Danish designer.

We are all individuals now. And its annoying, and most shockingly - boring. Back in my theatre sports days at college the terrible amatuer comics made classic mistakes like 'dressing funny instead of being funny' we'd see teams turn up in crazy ties, or pulling their pants up to high and it was always a tell tale sign that they had a weak grasp on anything remotely representing a sense of humour.

The funniest people often dressed in the blandest clothing, you'd probably describe them as 'bookish' yet these were the crazy motherfuckers that kept me guessing the whole time.

Same applies to plain old 'interesting' I don't advocate obfuscation as in revealing nothing of yourself in order to seem mysterious, but usually the most interesting and witty people I've met have just been wearing a polo shirt and jeans (for women) and tracksuit pants and thongs (both men and women).

For them it's hard to guess what they do on a weekend, what they study, what movies they like, whether they are 'Planet Terror' or 'Death Proof', or 'Mystic River' or 'Gran Torino' and you end up asking the questions.

Perhaps the answer lies in 'What Got You Here Won't Get You There' in the counter intuitive revelation that in any conversation the person that listens more than talks always gives the more favorable impression.

Same applies to clothes, the less your clothing says, the more interesting (I at least) find you. The most alternative clothings always seem like the cliched desperate cry for attention. I've been guilty of it, at one time or another, perhaps because I was a middle child or some shit. But some people truly do come across as desperate.

Some people can get a lot out of some simple listening, so I am prepared to extend the benefit of the doubt but often it turns out exactly as you suspected and first impressions do count: The person has put on a uniform they call 'Individuality'.

In broader fashion terms I simply hate the waste of trying to think clothing can transform somebodies personality.

Bicycles as fashion accessories, there's nothing particularly interesting about riding a bicycle, and no matter what type of bike you ride you will gain membership to the most interesting conversation you can have with someone about bike riding - the 'bikes vs. cars vs. pedestrians' arguement (as in who's most annoying on the road). You don't need to have a customized fixed gear with chopped and flopped handlebars and track geometry. It just necessitates the need to come up with excuses as to why you bought the bike for 'practical not fashion' reasons.

Now imagine if you met a sculptor at a party. Wouldn't that be interesting. You almost never meet sculptors and people no very little about it, yet sculpture has some of the highest exposure out of any art in the community. Do people bother to dress like sculptors? What does a sculptor look like?

It's hard to deny that of all the people you could make small talk with, a sculptor would be a winner vs say a bank employee, a doctor or a lawyer. Yet you don't see teenagers toting around welding masks, aprons or chisels to try and appear more interesting. It would be too overt, and one could be too easily caught out.

Purchasing an identity through clothing though is both flatery and Identity theft. If somebody impersonated you in order to clean out your bank account you would definitely call it theft. What if they didn't take your money but something else you had earned but they were stealing?

Johnny Rotten is an interesting guy, but are his fans that dress like him necessarily so? Tony Hawk is an amazing skater, but is every teenager that dresses like him as charismatic? Daniel Craig strikes you as sophisticated, does anybody that puts on that watch achieve the same amount of polish?

That's what the people that cash in on these things are motivated to have you believe. But just like money, character is earned, not purchased. To be interesting you have to do something, something more than diving into goodwill clothing bins to pick out the good stuff before it goes to some charity op shop.

But alas, everyone can be a designer and the myth that you can buy an identity seems to be overpowering the reality that you can't. The only way around any of it I can see is to adopt a strong 'utilitarian' pose. If you see somebody in basketball gear you should press them for their knowledge of basketball. If you see somebody wearing a Greek Fisherman's hat ask them if they are Greek or a Fisherman. (thanks to the Chaser for that one).

Only when people regularly 'hmmph' at people who dress above their weight division will people stop trying to create an illusion and perhaps dedicate their energy to creating a reality.

And people will stop introducing me to boring scrubbers that they think I would be into. :(